WEEK ZERO: INTRO MINGLE

[probe]

POPULATION: 37

There's the soft, chiming ding of an elevator as you slowly grow conscious. You remember the sound of a voice whispering in your ear, and then a very gentle, easy darkness as you fell asleep.

Then the elevator jolts, and you promptly ram into some of the thirty or so other people also waking up from their nap. Time to trample people on your way out! Be careful not to rip your flattering outfit with light up furry ears of an animal of your choice. On this elevator there are a total of 10 buttons and they're all lit up! But they don't work. A shame. The elevator doesn't go anywhere else.

In any case, once you exit the elevator, you'll find that you have a decently wide area to explore. There doesn't seem to be any sort of exit to the outside world, but that's okay. You didn't want to leave without what you came for, right? Besides, it's wonderful here: the temperature is perfect, every surface is as soft as clouds, and the atmosphere is so, so inviting. The base itself is low-lit in fluorescent neon colors which shift and pulse over time, and there's a soft, reassuring humming sound under your feet. It would be comforting if you didn't feel like you were being watched every time you walk along the hallways.

But hey, don't worry about that! Maybe you should be more concerned with the phone in your pocket! The phones have a few functions, as well as a low pixel camera. Pictures are in black and white, so no brightly colored selfies for you. Oh, and while you're taking those selfies, you might notice the symbol of your Avatar tattooed and glowing faintly on the back of your hand. Hope you're fine with impromptu body mods.

Eventually during your wandering, you'll find your room with roommates included! On the floor of your room, there is a big gift box with your name on it. Upon opening it, you will be absolutely obliterated with glittery confetti. But once you manage to get past that, the gift box contains the following:

✦ your item from home
✦ a pair of boxer-briefs labeled "ball hammock"
✦ a stress ball that looks suspiciously like a boob
✦ a rainbow bath bomb
✦ a Polaroid camera with 10 instant film
✦ a frozen steak in a vacuum-sealed pouch
✦ a blue and pink dual flashlight; one end has a normal white bulb, and one end has a blacklight bulb
✦ a tiny crown

Welcome to your new home. Take some time to look around, talk to your fellow indulgers. All of you can see each other's symbols on the back of your hands - maybe it'll strike up a conversation. After all, there's no better way to get to know each other than talking about your sins on the first date!

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Comments

[executeprogramming]

1. Fresh off the turbolift

[as the lift comes to a stop, there's a distinctly electronic sound from inside the elevator, like a computer warming up and dozens of mechanical motors beginning to spin

as the doors open, a metallic orange robot—which had been stock still and probably easily confused for a piece of modern art or cheesy sci-fi decoration—begins to speak to himself among the chaos of the scramble to exit, the voice distinctly synthetic and tinny, as if playing from an old radio]

Observation: This is far, far more scantily clad meatbags than I imagined I would be faced with on reactivation.

Contemplative: Another Hutt sex dungeon, perhaps? Seems like an unlikely place to find the master, unless they hid their proclivities well...

[he sighs dramatically, put out by all the...flesh on display]

However, if I am here to kill something it would be rather unsatisfying, I have to say. I should hope the master wouldn't send me to exterminate a herd of half-naked humans in a night club. Out of practice as I may be.

[absolutely all of this is said out loud as people are exiting the elevator, and his volume is conversation-level—as he casually ponders his options for violence, he begins examining the elevator panel and trying to take it apart]

2. A droid walks into a bar

[since most of the other arrivals immediately went exploring and/or knife-stealing, HK-47 approaches the Common Room's bar and whoever is sitting there, interrupting any conversation or relaxation happening]

Query: Pardon me, meatbag, is this perhaps some type of prison built for humiliation? If I may ask, have you committed a heinous crime in the recent past? Wanton destruction? Cannibalism? Surely something truly awful to merit such punishment.

[he looks the person just trying to have a drink up and down]

Observation: You don't seem particularly dangerous or bloodthirsty, but I do enjoy being surprised by sudden organic violence. Please do tell.

3. Let me see what you have!—A gun!

[at some point, HK-47 manages to successfully locate his room and retrieve a large, shiny rifle from the confetti box—he doesn't seem particularly bothered to be covered in sparkles and emerges out into the hallway, eyes glowing and tone concerningly giddy]

Commentary: I can only assume that the killing will start shortly. I wonder if I have some time to warm-up.

[then, seeing someone else in the hallway:]

Reassurance: Oh do not worry, meatbag, I promise not to shoot you, of course. I don't have any reason to aside from a desire to calibrate this beautiful weapon and confirm its continued effective operation.

3

[shiftingwinds]

[well, shi qingxuan is heading into her room, when suddenly a killer robot emerges from it! huh.




huh.]

Well, thanks for that promise!

[executeprogramming]

[my my the Jedi certainly found him fast—just look at all those robes and all that hair]

Response: I am glad to hear you have been put at ease. Very trusting, aren't we?

Query: Would you happen to be Shi Qingxuan, the other occupant of these...colorful living quarters? Or are you here to rifle through possessions in search of a better weapon?

Warning: I would not advise trying to take this one.

[shiftingwinds]

[oh jesus i didn't even think about the robes-jedi thing]

Oh! Yes, I'm Shi Qingxuan. [...] So you must be my roommate, then! How interesting.

Don't worry, I'm not interested in your weapon.

[executeprogramming]

Query: Roommate? [and indeed one corner of the room has a sciencey-looking circular charging port] So have I been taken back to that wretched Jedi temple again to learn about peace and non-violence?

[with unmasked disgust in his artificial voice, he appears to size her up]

Are you to be looking after me, then? I don't detect any new protocols for a change in master, and seem to be as-yet lacking in a restraining bolt.

Statement: And of course the Jedi never before provided me with such fine weaponry. Or any weaponry at all, for that matter.

3.

[headmt]

[The sparkles look good.]

Already? We don't even get 24 hours?

[executeprogramming]

[somehow, the sparkles do look good! better than drab coppery orange]

Response: That would allow for more preparation, but is such a long time to wait.

[he takes in Molly's appearance]

Observation: I had thought there were only humans here. How nice to see some variety.

[headmt]

[Doing a little pose where he holds the edges of his coat out for Observation.]

You know, here I was thinking exactly the same thing! A little human-crowded in this place, most definitely.

2

[gamerbrain]

Aoi has never done anything illegal or violent.

[executeprogramming]

[faced with such an innocent-looking appearance and clear condemnation of illegal actions, the droid's tone shifts from one of sly confiding to placating innocence]

Agreement: Yes, of course not! I myself am also law-abiding...always following the law is what I'm programmed to do.

Clarification: Who is this "Aoi" you are providing an alibi for?

[gamerbrain]

[ idk if i'd call it a condemnation, she sounded pretty neutral.

and she just? points to herself? ]

Aoi also does what she's programmed to do.

2

[holeful]

[Ah, the strange robot from the elevator. How exciting. He sips his drink and then complies with this offer of conversation.]

Haha... You know, I don't think most people would freely confess their crimes to a stranger.

[executeprogramming]

Query: Are you a member of the local law enforcement?

Statement: If so, I disavow any knowledge of violent acts perpetrated by myself or others. I am a law-abiding droid through and through.

[holeful]

Me? No, no. I'm quite far away from being someone who enforces the law... Or perhaps... not that far. But if you're asking if I am a police officer, then no.

Does that change your position? What's the other side of that "if" statement?

3. IKI your MURDERBOT

[aubins]

[









hm. ]

Right. Well, I feel reassured. Thanks.

[executeprogramming]

Statement: Wonderful, that's a good human. Very trusting and not in a heightened state of alarm or defensive readiness.

Observation: You seem to be unarmed. Are you really sure that's wise? There may be other dangerous lifeforms here who wish to do you harm.

[aubins]

[ hm. ]

Not everyone walks around waving their weaponry to the world. Takes away the element of surprise if you do.

1.....

[nodo]

[ HONESTLY. this robot is entirely valid and law is just sighing along with him. he's not insulted about being referred to as a "meatbag" or even the part where extermination comes up. honestly? the thing that bothers him the most is: ]

Hutt sex dungeon?

[executeprogramming]

[he looks up and answers, his hands continuing to independently and deftly work at the electronics behind the elevator's broken panel]

Explanation: A sex dungeon operated by the Hutts.

[nodo]

follow me here!!

1

[fluffier]

[ That is a lot of fancy talk! Luckily for Yuel, she doesn't pay any attention to it.

What she does notice is a robot dressed like Ariana Grande and the sight forces her to double over with laughter, clutching her stomach and pointing right at him. ]

[executeprogramming]

[HK had thought all the humans scrambled over each other to escape into the sex dungeon, so he looks curiously at the small laughing one]

Query: Is there something funny about me, meatbag? Do I look like some sort of clown to you?

[turning his head causes his lightup lothcat ears to bob]

[fluffier]

[ It still takes a moment for Yuel's laughter to wind down, and she's wiping the tears from her eyes when the question hits her, and she's running right up to HK, eyes wide as she leans up on his chest. ]

Whooaa, are ya actually talkin' to me? I thought ya were just some kinda fancy decoration.

let's go 2

[liuli]

[ a talking iron puppet!!! who would've thunk. gu yun's sipping his drink when he's approached, and though his eyebrows raise, he just looks... kind of delighted as he's being observed, expression sliding into a grin. ]

Nothing of the sort! I'm not feeling particularly humiliated - maybe a bit humbled, and wondering what the thought processes of the Iron Puppets I've grown up with might have been like. [ shen yi would be SHITTING HIMSELF. ] Have you committed cannibalism or wanton destruction? Can iron puppets even commit cannibalism?

[executeprogramming]

[he draws back in feigned, artificial surprise]

Response: Have I? Certainly not! I am a law-abiding droid merely programmed for protocol and interpersonal communication.

Commentary: It is the menagerie of suspicious organics here that I would suspect of harboring dangerous intentions.