WEEK ZERO: INTRO MINGLE

[probe]

POPULATION: 37

There's the soft, chiming ding of an elevator as you slowly grow conscious. You remember the sound of a voice whispering in your ear, and then a very gentle, easy darkness as you fell asleep.

Then the elevator jolts, and you promptly ram into some of the thirty or so other people also waking up from their nap. Time to trample people on your way out! Be careful not to rip your flattering outfit with light up furry ears of an animal of your choice. On this elevator there are a total of 10 buttons and they're all lit up! But they don't work. A shame. The elevator doesn't go anywhere else.

In any case, once you exit the elevator, you'll find that you have a decently wide area to explore. There doesn't seem to be any sort of exit to the outside world, but that's okay. You didn't want to leave without what you came for, right? Besides, it's wonderful here: the temperature is perfect, every surface is as soft as clouds, and the atmosphere is so, so inviting. The base itself is low-lit in fluorescent neon colors which shift and pulse over time, and there's a soft, reassuring humming sound under your feet. It would be comforting if you didn't feel like you were being watched every time you walk along the hallways.

But hey, don't worry about that! Maybe you should be more concerned with the phone in your pocket! The phones have a few functions, as well as a low pixel camera. Pictures are in black and white, so no brightly colored selfies for you. Oh, and while you're taking those selfies, you might notice the symbol of your Avatar tattooed and glowing faintly on the back of your hand. Hope you're fine with impromptu body mods.

Eventually during your wandering, you'll find your room with roommates included! On the floor of your room, there is a big gift box with your name on it. Upon opening it, you will be absolutely obliterated with glittery confetti. But once you manage to get past that, the gift box contains the following:

✦ your item from home
✦ a pair of boxer-briefs labeled "ball hammock"
✦ a stress ball that looks suspiciously like a boob
✦ a rainbow bath bomb
✦ a Polaroid camera with 10 instant film
✦ a frozen steak in a vacuum-sealed pouch
✦ a blue and pink dual flashlight; one end has a normal white bulb, and one end has a blacklight bulb
✦ a tiny crown

Welcome to your new home. Take some time to look around, talk to your fellow indulgers. All of you can see each other's symbols on the back of your hands - maybe it'll strike up a conversation. After all, there's no better way to get to know each other than talking about your sins on the first date!

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Comments

[holeful]

Of course. Though, it's nothing particularly exciting or unusual. I like to try to read as much as I can.

[bachelorbored]

Oh, I try not to.

[holeful]

[What a curious thing to say. People usually just say they don't have time to read, or simply dont. But to try not to?]

And why is that?

[bachelorbored]

Because eyes are real, and they matter.

[holeful]

.....

[Listen he tries to be nice and accepting but.]

I don't know what that has to do with reading?

[bachelorbored]

Eye strain, my dear hole man. Eye strain.

That's why I rely solely on audiobooks. I would tell you the website I usually obtain them from, but they haven't renewed their sponsorship deal with me yet. If you listen carefully, though, it might be... "audible"!

[he beams.]

I'll let them backpay me for that one.

[holeful]

[Ah, that makes more sense.]

Ah, I see! That's fair. So you do enjoy books, you just prefer to listen rather than read?

[bachelorbored]

A proper gentleman is always well-read. That's a part of the appeal. Knowledge, as they say, is powerful.

Consider the following: the sky is blue. Why?

[holeful]

Ah, if I remember correctly, it's because the gases in the atmosphere scatter the shorter wavelengths of sunlight more effectively, and those wavelengths are blue light.

[bachelorbored]

Oh, sure.

But can we go deeper?

[holeful]

... Deeper?

[Well...]

The wavelength of blue light is usually about 400-500 nanometers.

[bachelorbored]

Deeper still!

[holeful]

I'm afraid I'm not sure what else I can tell you.

[bachelorbored]

Think about it.

It reflects the blueness of our hearts.

[holeful]

....

No, no, it's because of atmospheric gases interacting with different wavelengths of light.

[bachelorbored]

Yet the water is also as blue as our souls.

Just a little coincidence for you.

[holeful]

I believe water is blue through a similar phenomenon as the sky, again, certain colors of light being refracted.

[bachelorbored]

The sky reflects the water. The water reflects the sky.

And all of them reflect the derelict mood of our emotions. Imagine what color the sky would be if society wasn't such an abysmal wasteland of wackness!

[holeful]

...

I think blue is a perfectly nice color.

[bachelorbored]

Absolutely. But it's still hard to imagine it in a fall collection.

I think there's a metaphor in that.

[holeful]

I'm trying to sort out if you're a poet or a designer, friend.

[What's your job, you mad lad.]

[bachelorbored]

And why not both?

I'm a free spirit at heart, don't you think?

[holeful]

Aah, I do think that.
[Kaz is certainly a man who thinks his own thoughts.]

You must be quite busy, then.

[bachelorbored]

Constantly. Hardly space to breath, these days—especially with my wretched aunt booking work against my will.

[holeful]

Well, you should be in a good mood then, since you'll have a break from all of that here.